When running a bath makes me wonder if I have enough energy to get in it.

When taking something out of the freezer makes me need an half hour rest.

When I work hard to eat enough to keep me going and I just can’t keep it down.

When I watch my oxygen saturations drop and my heart rate rise.

When I phone the hospital in defeat and ask for an appointment as soon as possible.

Then I truly know that my life is not in my hands.

Again, I realise that I have no resources of my own to fall back upon.

Here is weakness.

Today I have nothing but my God.

5 thoughts on “When…

  1. What you said reminded me of a prayer that helps me a lot, you've probably heard of it, it's called St Teresa's (probably spelt wrong) bookmark:

    Let nothing disturb thee,
    nothing affright thee;
    all things are passing,
    God never changeth!
    Patient endurance attaineth to all things;
    who God possesseth
    in nothing is wanting;
    alone God sufficeth.

    Especially the last line, hard lesson to learn though. Still praying xxx


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